...his usual stomping grounds, that is.
I made my first-ever visit to Bed Bath & Beyond yesterday. I've tolerated sleeping on lousy pillows for way too long and I finally treated myself to an upgrade. Plus I wanted to check out this place that has totally plagiarized the name of my blog.
Bed Bath turns out to be a nice store, with an extensive array of appealing merchandise. With all the rustic welcome mats and the Polartec throws, the Calphalon this and Wamsutta that, I felt like I'd been spirited into wedding-registry purgatory. (I've never registered for a wedding, so someday I will surely change that opinion to either registry heaven or hell.)
At the risk of sounding like a thousand hacky comedians, my strong sense was that there were three categories of people in Bed Bath & Beyond:
- Women customers with the mild smiles of people doing something they enjoy.
- Helpful gay men who work there.
- Men who have no clue what they're doing but know they're missing a playoff game for this.
A gentleman from category 2 and a lady from category 1 both helped me navigate the bewildering pillow section. It turns out the appropriate degree of firmness depends on whether you sleep on your back, side or front.
I still don't get the difference among identical-looking and -feeling $10 pillows, $40 pillows, $100 pillows and $180 pillows, but I don't really care. I'm happy with the ones I bought and any of them would have been better than the tired old ones I'm getting rid of.
I also set a new distinction in the annals of American retail: first idiot ever to shop at Bed Bath & Beyond without using one of their ubiquitous 20% off coupons. I told you I don't know what I'm doing.