In the 1995 movie To Die For, Nicole Kidman's shallow, ambitious weather girl memorably opined that you're no one in America unless you're on TV.
On today's planet Earth—owned by Google, you just live here—the same could be said of online page views. At a time when search engines are the prism through which so many people look at the world, isn't it axiomatic that if you don't show up in search results, then you don't exist?
Ignoring the obvious gaping holes in this reasoning, I'm still curious what kind of search engine-generated traffic will result if I blurt out a stream-of-consciousness rant of pure Google bait, something like this:
barack obama john edwards change iowa caucuses new hampshire primaries hillary clinton presumptive democratic nominee mike huckabee baptist preacher mitt romney mormon john mccain ron paul tom tancredo immigration rudy giuliani 9/11 scary fascist fred thompson young wife gop mayor bloomberg jewish independent candidate global warming benazir bhutto al qaeda osama bin laden iraq george w. bush dick cheney treason new york giants dallas cowboys tony romo jessica simpson new england patriots undefeated 16-0 tom brady gisele bundchen donald trump celebrity apprentice mad men best new show dow jones industrial average ben bernanke federal funds rate cut sam zell tribune company esop new yorker cartoon conde nast paris hilton britney spears kevin federline custody dr. phil pam anderson divorce rick salomon david letterman wga writers strike conan o'brien still good jay leno still unwatchable tom cruise scientology l. ron hubbard katie holmes paternity hannah montana high school musical roger clemens 60 minutes interview steroids mitchell report baseball hall of fame andre dawson mark mcgwire jim rice goose gossage replacements morcheeba u2 radiohead free download itunes ipod iphone nintendo wii guitar hero youtube avenue q apatow superbad pineapple express no country for old men juno there will be blood indiana jones 4 and of course porn porn porn.